I'm still not sure you are trying to DESTROY yourself. Alter yourself, perhaps. And the problem with controlling pain is that you have to do something painful in order to feel the pain in order to control it. Anything painful tends to be self-damaging -- that's why the sense of pain evolved in the first place, to prevent you from damaging yourself -- but if you have no other way of dealing with your pain, what else are you supposed to do?
I'm not encouraging you to continue hurting yourself. But it might be worth trying to figure out WHY you are hurting yourself. And who -- or what -- that pain is benefiting.
Actually, I am doing something very like that -- working on getting used to a high-protein, high-fiber diet (almost all the fiber coming from vegetables!). Not only no sugar, but no bread or other carbohydrates! I've lost 20 pounds already, and I've only been messing around with the diet, not working on it very seriously yet.
And, even though I do get a bit hungry on this diet, it's not "suffering" to go through it if I'm doing it because I MADE MY MIND UP TO DO SO. My tummy can grumble all it likes -- I know what I am doing is a GOOD thing. And I find that, the more of this good stuff i eat, the more my body realizes it can get along just fine without the bread and sugar and carbohydrates.
If you are addicted to pain, consider the possibility that you could also become "addicted" to a LACK of pain. (Sort of like that old joke of hitting yourself on the head with a hammer: it feels so good when you stop!) That, and the lack of all sheer the mental and physical EFFORT it takes to both create and then deal with all that pain.
It's amazing what you can do if you just decide to do it.
And another suggestion: not to seem that I'm getting "airy-fairy" on you all of a sudden, but have you tried meditation? Never mind all the mystical stuff that goes along with it -- the method has been shown to have positive, PHYSICAL effects on the brain. Sort of like karate or kung-fu: you don't have to swallow any of the mystical stuff (I sure don't!) to realize that the technique works. What meditation does is to increase both the volume and the number of connections in the frontal lobes of the brain -- exactly those areas which are important to decision-making, planning, and, especially, coming up with alternative solutions to problems you are experiencing. If you strengthen those areas, you will not only become more willing to change old habits, but have more of the strength needed to make those changes.
I found it hard to give up sugary things. When I quit Orange Juice over a year ago I was craving it for at least a couple months. Now I have no interest in it. I gave up potato chips years ago but I still get occasional cravings. And then there was bread (I still crave it occasionally) and cookies and all that stuff. I mainly eat meat and fish and chicken, berries, apples etc, leafy green vegetables, nuts, and occasionally a little bit of bread when I eat at my sister's house, sometimes a potato just because she serves them. But mostly I think I'm off the sugar addiction now. When ever I have something that is sweet I can't eat half what I used to, which is good I think
I'm familiar with being addicted to pain. For a long time I was addicted to being depressed, that is, I'd surround myself with anything depressing. Most of my music collection is either angry or depressing sounding, and a lot of movies I like are depressing. In fact, I only have a few comedy films in my collection That changed recently when I saw For a Good Time, Call. I cannot get enough of that movie it makes me laugh constantly. This is a good change in my life I think
I haven't tried meditation but I think I might do something similar to that: I like to just think about nothing in bed at night in the dark, sometimes I just lay down with my mp3 player in the dark. I find both relaxing. I'm pretty good at paying attention to my body and not over-doing it. That's a polite way of saying that I'm occasionally lazy.
Meditation is actually a LOT more complicated than just relaxing. It is a very alert, very conscious, very aware sort of state. I liken it to listening just as hard as you can for a lovely, but very quiet sound. Your mind is absolutely focused -- just not on your thoughts. It sounds weird, but it works.